This was the headline on the news at the gym the other morning. If I had cared enough to actually listen to it, I would have watched the whole interview with whatever Dr. Spock expert they had on. But, ummmm I didn't. Probably because I was too busy gathering up the eyeballs that had just rolled out of my head.
My point of this post is in no way to debate spanking as a form of punishment. I realize that this is kind of a "Mommy blog" and that the whole issue of spanking is a hot topic in the parenting world. I have certainly had my fair share of debates about this topic. I will say that I was spanked as a child (although my mom was more of just a 'hit you wherever my hand lands first' type of 'spanker') and I turned out just fine. Well, there's that little twitch but you know, mostly I get by...
I will totally admit to yelling at my kid though, er excuse me, raising my voice. I believe I have even documented proof in a previous post, stating that yelling was the new talking at our house. Oh, and I have the most uber sensitive kid in the world. He cries Barry Manilow tunes, I swear to God. Anyhoo, I can't really get behind this whole yelling is the new spanking movement. Don't get me wrong, I don't just go around randomly yelling at my poor kid, but when he answers the door by himself, especially if I am naked and cleaning the bathroom at the time, he is getting yelled at. If he is still doing something I asked him not to do 50 times in a nice, calm voice, chances are, he is gonna get yelled at. Is this so wrong? My dad was a yeller and honestly, his yelling didn't bother me, it was more the bullshit that spewed out of his mouth that was bothersome and scarred me for life. I don't really see how scolding my child, by yelling, because he wandered off or touched the hot stove (examples because obviously, my little angel would never commit such crimes) is going to scar him for life.
I'm going to be thirtysomething in a month and I don't remember the last time that my life was all candy and roses. Are we really doing our children a service by padding and protecting the world they live in so much? I came across a parenting book that said we shouldn't even send kids to their rooms because it's cruel and they will feel alienated and abandoned. (I don't think they should be sent to their room because hell, what kid wouldn't want to get sent to his room - that's where all his toys are. That's like sending a kid to Disneyland for punishment.) In life, don't we get punished for our actions, is it so bad to teach kids about consequences? Why is everything all touchy-feely now? It's like they come up with all these things to make parents feel guilty about on purpose, as if being in charge of another human being's life isn't hard enough.
Damn, time to get crackin' on this copy of, "Parenting Without Yelling."
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7 comments:
I am a yeller. My kids don't even blink. I think kids need boundaries and when they cross them, they need to be told. If I thought my kids would listen to a calm mommy, great, but been there done that and the tee shirt wasn't worth the ink.
I'm the mother who has the loud voice, I'm just loud. It's cultural in a lot of ways--my Sicilian Nana was also loud. Thankfully most people around here don't mind & if they did I probably wouldn't be able to hear them over my loud voice ;)
I agree with you. The kids are going to grow up thinking life has no consequences for bad behavior. We've already turned into a rude country, what's next?
my husband and i both yell. I wish we didn't so much. i'd like to be that calm person, but I'm not.
I agree about the sending your kid to his room. Too much fun stuff!
Good post!
Seriously some of this stuff is just ridiculous... Dr. spock gave alot advice about parenting and his kid commited suicide... so sad.
So really you do the best you can.
I yell, my family yells, We are loud and they get punished. I was spanked as a kid and I am good. I know I am a better mother than my mother was but isn't that what you want for your kids to have it better.
The ones that try to make all the rules and things are the ones that say when a kid kills someone. The parent didn't teach them right from wrong or someone should beat that kid.. ya a huh....
Spank or no spank that is what makes this country so great. We get to decide what we think is a good thing for your own kids and hope for the best....
LOL... oh man this comment is long. sorry
I've been known to yell at my child all. I doubt it will scar her in the long run...
I yell, I sometimes spank, and my kids, well, they manage. Good call, yo.
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